Brick Therapy – Panacea to Cure Everything

Are you concerned about the toxic chemicals promoted by Big Pharma?

Are you suffering from pain? Exhaustion? Confusion? Shortness of breath? Blood loss? Depression? Vertigo? Credulity?  Gender uncertainty? Daily nourishment craving? Pre-meditated Homicide?

Are you looking for a simple cure to all your health problems?

Is Western medicine letting you down?

Have you heard of Brick Therapy?  If not, you should have!

Brick therapy is all-natural, has no unexpected side effects, and has been used by real people just like you, without the assistance of a doctor, for over 2.5 million years.

 Original Brick Therapist, Gark, tests an early proto-type.

People who have not had success with any other healing modality have found release with Brick Therapy!

What is Brick Therapy? Brick therapy uses quantum energy to expel the bad symptoms from the primary area of concern in your body to elsewhere! Your RBT (Registered Brick Therapist) will individually asses your need based upon your personal symptomatic expression. At which point they will determine where in your body your dis-ease is emanating from and dispel it with a careful application of a carefully chosen organic brick.

Case Study: In 1783, a woman in Salem Massachusetts who was diagnosed with a case of Cannibalistic Porphyria was inspected by a brick therapist who determined that one simple application of a highly kinetic brick to each canine would solve the problem. It did. The patient was cured for life.

Brick Therapy can cure anything! Including, but not limited to: Migraines, Allergies, Hay-fever, Constipation, Diarrhea, Insomnia, Chronic Fatigue, Fibromyalgia, Menopause, Perimenopause, Heximenopause, Decimenopause, Menstrual Disorders, Acne, Eczema, Psoriasis, Colic, Teething, Coughs, Colds, H1N1, Immunity, ADD, Autism, Depression, Anxiety, Arthritis, High Blood Pressure, Thyroid Problems, Intellectual Dishonesty, Sudden Total Weight Loss, the Willys, Wii Tennis Elbow, Brick Therapy Injuries, Bad Google Searches, Hootie & the Blowfish Appreciation, Bad Credit.

How many sessions of brick therapy are required?

Many people find that they have had enough brick therapy after a single session, but other people find that they need to try it several times before the effect sinks in. For some chronic conditions an ongoing regimen of repeated bricking may be necessary to maintain a life-long equilibrium.

Organic Bricks?

Of course!  You DO know what bricks are made from, right?  Dirt, of course!  Where does dirt come from?  The Earth!  Can you say that about other therapies?  No, you can’t.  How can you trust something that doesn’t come from the planet that gives us life?  You can’t and nothing is closer to Mother Earth than dirt!

What kind of credentials does my RBT have?

Take it from us, Brick Therapists are all highly trained professionals.

They get registered (the ‘R’ in ‘RBT’) from our exclusive on-line school.

You can be an RBT too!

  • Do you think health is good?
  • Have you seen different types of masonry?
  • Are you capable of thinking two mutually exclusive ideas at once?

 Then you are eligible to graduate from Brick University of Medicine. Apply now!

A proud BUM graduate ready to get his diploma.

But how does Brick Therapy work?

Lots of people ask us this. The answer is simple: Brick Therapy works because Stephen Hawking, vibrations and the bible!

But then how do we know?

Because there has been a scientific study of six-people. The surviving member of the study-group swears to this day that her arthritis pain is gone in entirety.

The small number of positive studies is a result of brick therapy being difficult to study using current scientific methods, because subjective effects cannot be readily measured, making it difficult to design or replicate studies. In addition, brick therapy treatments are highly individualized and there is no uniform prescribing standard. On the other hand, many aspects of the interactions between the homeopathic practitioner and his or her patients may be quite beneficial, and can be studied more easily.

In any case, a group of RBTs declared in the Journal of Applied Brick Medicine & Therapy that brick therapy can be used as a placebo with the consent of the patient.

Trust them, they’re RBTs!
They peer reviewed each other.
So what are you waiting for? Get on down the road to wellness!

Disclaimer: Brick Therapy should not be used by pregnant women, animal lovers, jackasses, bloggers, residents of Quebec, drum-circle participants, chronic breathers, 1 in 150000 of all lotto winners, repeat users, or people who take it seriously.  Brick therapy should be used for entertainmnet purposes only.

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  • Kennedy Goodkey

    Kennedy is a film-maker and skeptic. As a skeptic his primary interests are in the communication and advocacy of skeptical and science issues, specifically calling attention to the idea that the standard practice of “playing nice with others” is not always the best approach, and definitely must be explored and refined as a tactic to be leveraged to best effect.